Know Your Local God Squad

Jupiter informed me that he's about to start an eight-week training course at the local police department with three of his fellow gun-toting god brothers from church, including the assistant pastor. For eight weeks they will be familiarized with local criminal activity and police procedures. This includes going on patrol with an officer, he says, trying hard not to gloat and failing miserably.

Suddenly, I have a vision of cross-encrusted jackboots wrestling a non-believers to the ground. Small, chromed fish symbols glittering in the night as a pack of Harleys leave the scene.

Jupiter already has an inflated sense of self-importance. I can't imagine how insufferable he'll be if endowed with an official certificate suitable for framing.

"So,how did this all come about?" I asked innocuously, so as not to arouse any suspicion of disapproval.

Turns out one of his god brothers is a police officer and he signed up their entire Big Boy club, sort of a Christian support group for manly men who meet for breakfast once a week and work out their issues.

"Man, I'll tell you what, it's good to know somebody on the inside, know what I mean?"

Weeks earlier, this same miracle-working godbrother turned a moving violation into a mere $100 ticket. Jupiter rear-ended some woman while momentarily distracted, pretty much destroying her car. His truck only sustained a pushed-in fender. Nobody was hurt, thank God, but for those out of the loop, this kind of accident could have cost hundreds of dollars in fines, several points on a license and mandatory driver safety school the violator would no doubt have to pay for.

"He swears he had nothing to do with it, but I know better," Jupiter says. "It's good to have someone on the inside..." His expression lingers until he's sure I've received the point.

His explanations always carry an air of exclusivity, a self-aggrandizing heap doled out on a daily basis; always right, always one better, never to be outdone, an Alpha Male In Good Standing With Jesus, Our Lord, Amen. If he were five, instead of forty-five, he'd be prancing around the school yard singing, "Nyah, nyah, nyah-nyah, nyah, nyah! I get to be the poleese-man and you-hoo-ooh do-on't!"

I admit to being a little jealous. Why does HE get be the policeman? And why are my tax dollars paying for it?

After a little digging, I got my answer. As part of our county's emergency preparedness program, citizen security forces are being trained in the event of some unsuspected cataclysm that, as history has proven, might overwhelm the funding, capacity and/or competency of our government agencies. Citizens will be 'better prepared to survive and recover from hazards including extreme weather, major power outages, fires, transportation or hazardous materials incidents, and weapons of mass destruction such as a chemical, biological, radiological, nuclear or explosive-incendiary incidents.' Or, say, the second-coming and the apocalypse.

In addition to preparing for emergencies, selected citizens will also be trained to help prevent a terrorist or criminal act by watching for suspicious activities and reporting them to authorities . Don't look now friend, but your assistant pastor has been drafted as an official snitch. Hope your tithings are in order Goody Proctor.

So, in the event of a cataclysmic emergency, Jupiter and his gun-toting godbrothers will be securing our homeland from terrorists and other godless non-believers. I think we've got the beginnings of a goon squad here.

It's not that I think they're not qualified to help the authorities protect their citizens in times of crisis, but I question their motivations and their commitment to secure the freedom of all Americans. Their loyalties lie with their community; their church according to their interpretation of the bible - and protecting them exclusively. They spend the majority of their week reading Christian books, listening to Christian Radio programs, Christina CD's, Christian DVDs and Christian brodcasts, not to mention encouraging "fellowship" among their followers. It's a closed loop of information without any outside input. When you're convinced you're right, you don't see the point of inviting outside opinions. When you add political and economic power to that you get fascism becauuse there are no dissenters around to say, "Hey, now, that's just f*in crazy." The members of the "in" club are worried about how they'll be perceived by "members" in this parallel world they've created and don't want to bring the weight of it down upon their heads so they remain silent, until it's too late.

So it worryies me that my local police are training these people up to protect me and mine. I understand the need to get community groups and churches involved in the procedures, because that's where people are and it makes them easier to reach. Fine. But I'm wary of involving organized religion in such sensitive security infrastructure as homeland security operations, and I kind of resent using tax dollars to train them to "save" me.

"I'm living for the hereafter," Jupiter told me the other day. "I'm not living for the here and now." Chilling words from a potential rescuer. Sounds like something an Iraqi martyr might say.

Christo-Fascism On The March

I'm reading a book called "American Fascists; The Christian Right and The War On America." by Chris Hedges, a respected war correspondent. It's about the rise of the Christian Right in the U.S., their formidible political, financial and media power, and their attack on secularism and humanism in the United States - (all the while claiming they're the victims, of course. Remember 2005's "attack" on Christmas? Ugh.). Hedges draws parallels between fascist movements of the past and Christian "Dominionists" whose political and media power affect and challenge every aspect of contemporary American culture.

To some, the possiblity of Dominionism (i.e. Christo-Fascism) taking over in America, and then the world, seems like just another pop conspiracy theory designed to sell books. Even Hedges himself admits, "It was hard, at the time, to take such fantastic rhetoric seriously, especially given the buffoonish quality of those who expounded it." But 25 years after he was warned about the rise of Christian fundamentalists by a professor at Harvard Divinity School, he witnessed the prophetic warning continue to manifest itself and, apparently, took it seriously enough to write a book about it.

If you'd like to get a good idea of what Hedges is expounding, Read this article at TheocracyWatch.org.

Oh, and by the way, when I bought this book, which is brand new and currently on the media lecture circuit, I had to ask for help at Borders Books to find it. A single copy was buried deep in the back of the store with the other political science books - not up front with the other hard-cover, non-fiction, new releases. Hey, Christianity is very $$$popular$$$ right now.

When someone is convinced they're right, surround themselves with others who feel exactly the same way, quash any dissenting opinions and and use God to justify their behavior, watch out. Christo-fascists and Islamo-fascists have more in common with eachother than they do with the mass of humanity.

Riffing On The Times 2.20.07

As always, the headlines are taken from The New York Times and the sub-heads are made-up.


Merger Would End Satellite Radio’s Rivalry - XM gets SIRIUS about forming monopoly

North Africa Feared as Staging Ground for Terror - Actual terror to take place elsewhere

Iraqi Militants Launch Attack on U.S. Outpost - Likewise, they are not welcomed as "liberators".

Anglicans Rebuke U.S. Branch on Same-Sex Unions - Insist both men and women should enjoy labor representation.

Old Foes Join in Anger as Train Bombing’s Toll Rises to 66 - Pakistan & India; terrorism makes strange bedfellows.

Mideast Talks Conclude With Little Result - What, this is news?

In New Orleans, Bands Struggle to Regain Footing - Katrina & Insurance fraud gives hope to homeless and hungry musicians.

Job Corps Plans Makeover for a Changed Economy - Poor find work as IED Inspectors and Community Relations Reps in Iraq

After a Rampage, Trying to Grasp What Led a Son to Kill - Mall maniac leaves....ok I can't think of anything to write here.

Delusional Hypocrisy

Yesterday morning I watched Representative John Boehner say, regarding Iraq, that, "We didn't start this war..."

Completely delusional. And I think he really believes it. He's still trying to confuse the War On Iraq with the "War On Terror." Still pretending that they're one and the same. As If saying it long enough, it will become true.

This reminds me of the claims by Christians that there's a perpetual attack on Christianity. Over and over again I hear, personally, that Christianity is being attacked by secular humanists and liberals. Give me a break. All we really hope to do is ignore you. By posing as a perpetual victim nobody will blame them when they "defend" themselves - even if that means throwing the first punch or worse. So much for turning the other cheek.



Re: Tim Hardaway's admitted homophobia. Don't condone violence against homosexuals, bu jeez, at least he's honest about his homophobia. Honesty is such a rare commodity these days.

Update

It's been quite a whiile since I've updated this blog. I think I just got so depressed about the state of our so-called union that I just had nothing more to add. Sure, the U.S. Democratic party's win in 2006 gave me a glimmer of hope that the whole election system hasn't been totally comprimised, but I tend to believe that it's because one set of theives and liars were able to able to upset the plans of the other group of theives and liars. I'm not foolish enough to believe that anyone will be doing the will of the people anytime soon.

But for two more years, the current administration in power will continue to loot our treasury either by unfair tax cuts for the rich, no-bid contracts for their buddies, or outright theft - like the 12billion that's somehow gone missing in Iraq. Any gains 'we the people' make will be paid for by us, as evidenced from the presidents proposed health care plan (i.e. the middle class with so-called "gold-plated health care plans" (his words) will pay taxes on that coverage to pay for the lower working-class tax credits (Why isn't anyone on the right screaming about that proposed tax increase? Fucking hypocrites). But he's thinking like the ivy-league snot. The poor/uninsured don't need and won't use tax credits.

One thing's for sure about these guys, they're high-rollers, radical risk-takers with brass balls who are going to take this game as far as they can before it's all over. The final grab. I think they're itching to start a regional war in the middle east while they still have their finger on the trigger. That should be interesting. Can't wait to see how Russia and China react.

And so it goes.

Edward Lazear, the chairman of the President's Council on Economic Advisors is telling me on C-Span that the economy is strong, productivity is up, wages are up, everthing good is up, up, up. My feeling is their economic policy is about as accurate as their post-invasion plans for Iraq - completely fucking deluded. Michigan is fucked. Ask our governor.

In my world, several companies around have condensed their operatioins, shipped their factories overseas or closed completely. Napoleon K still doesn't have health care and he and my wife are earning barely above the poverty rate (which is a lie anyway) with no hope of earning substantiallly more. Welcome to the McJobs of the 21st century, controlled by the handful of companies who occupy every strip mall and big-box store in your town or city. A life of crime is looking more and more like a viable alternative to working hard and playing by the rules.


At least life in America isn't boring. And I would guess it's going to get a whole lot more exciting if things keep going the way they are. Can't wait.


Eat The Rich